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    January 13

    1月12日

     
    今天突然想通宵,虽然也不知道上网想干点什么.其实很讨厌网吧的气氛,讨厌那些在我面前出现的 小B,大B,老B们......感觉在网吧里人人都像傻B一样,很好笑,这时好想我家的宝贝电脑啊,也不知道它有没有想我?今天杭州下了一天的雨,到了傍晚天才开始晴,接着有下起了雾,雾很大,外面的一切都模糊了,似乎一切都变的好看了,周围的一切突然像变成了一种什么梦幻世界,这样更让我觉得我周围的环境在平日里是那么的丑陋,只有把你们变模糊了,你们才能变的好看一点,真是可耻.
    这几天一直在考虑一个问题:我附中这4年到底都干了什么?为什么我回忆起来的东西都是那么干瘪?答案是这4年我像样的事没干几样,没用的事倒干了无数,其实也有用和没用感念用时也不是那么绝对.但是从我现在的情况来说,的确应该是没干多少有用的事.唉...... 
    一晃真快,马上要考试了,一年真是像做梦一样就过去了,今年真得拼了,再他妈考不上就......(@#4$%)真是希望和我一样今年都要再来一年的哥们们,咱今年都考上.
    现在每天过的真是昏昏沉沉,无所事事......我突然对自己失去了往日的一份自信,我不知道自己将来能变成什么样.虽然有句话是这么说的:"把握现在就是幸福."我也在不停的把握,但我发现我的现在其实并不幸福,虽然一切都是相对而言.不过都不是我想要的,又何谈幸福呢?不是我不知足,而是一切都深刻的体现着:人活着本身就是一种惩罚.
    总会去看朋友们的MSN 特喜欢看他们记载着真实生活的照片,喜欢看到那些真实的写照......那些照片总是让我想到很多......朋友们,忠心的祝福你们每天都开心,我想这样就足够了.
      
                 

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